The Upside of Limitation
When Fewer Choices Are Actually Better [22]:
"Mental toughness is often portrayed as determination and persistence, but it can also be flexibility and adaptability.
- I can be happy anywhere.
- I can work with what I have.
- I can have a good day with anyone.
You are tough when your mood is not dependent on your conditions." - James Clear
You know that feeling when your favorite song comes on the radio. This could be at a random coffee shop or a clothing store; the infinitely satisfying and serendipitous sensation it brings that can’t be replicated if you click open your phone and put on the same song.
That my friend is a prime example of satisfaction from scarcity.
I spent the last three weeks in Seattle, Washington. The majority of that time is spent working remotely in a hotel or dorm room. I barely saw more than five, if not three people a week yet I’m exponentially more satisfied than my time in Texas, where I had the freedom to roam the city, choosing to socialize with anyone and at any time I wish.
All that got me thinking about the upsides of limitation. One might reasonably argue from the abundance of my mountains and lakes photos that being in the Pacific Northwest in the summer unarguably provides better experience than a scorching central Texas city does in July. Yet, I am a flawed narrator and a messy thinker, so bear with me.
Choice paralysis is a phenomenon where when one is presented with too many options that she becomes paralyzed and more likely to select a suboptimal choice. A chronic slow decision maker, I understood this phenomenon more than anyone. I spent the bulk of my college career debating what type of career I want to go into, baffled by the sheer amount of options that my college offered.
Every week, I spend hours in front of my laptop brainstorming from an ocean of possibilities for my next essay’s topic, most often ending up with 10 plus half hearted drafts and running late to each publication. When I have days to write, I wait until the very last minute. I own my platform and agenda, so I can do anything. But yet I can’t do them very well. There is well circulated saying in the content creation world that “If you try to be everything to everyone, you become nothing.” Having too much freedom and too many options sometimes hinder my progress.
Most representative of this is how I approach my career: my eyes are always onto the next thing with my feet barely wet in one place. I have options but I’m constantly not satisfied. I was happy for a few days before I begin daydreaming about newer and better endeavors to chase after. Having many resources and options never really benefit me. It confuses me instead.
I realize that when I am tied up in a time constraint, I learn to strategize and fit all of my to-dos neatly, becoming effusively appreciative of my down time. When the economy is entering down turn, I am more or less grateful that I am at least employed. When I’m away from my family, the moment I get to hang with people who exude love and authenticity, I happily enjoy their presence.
For me, abundance sometimes breed discontent and scarcity a lot of time builds gratitude. When I don’t have many options, I am forced to focus on what I have in the present, to savor and experience it fully - whether it’s a relationship, a job or experience.
Living in Seattle for the summer, I don’t see dozens of people weekly or try a new restaurant every other day. I however, learned to be grateful for the opportunities to meet people when they come, the nature that I got to euphorically relish every weekend and the amazing food scene :)
Quality > Quantity (more on this another time)
Consistency > Intensity.
And sometimes, scarcity is better than abundance.
feel the same about abundance :(